Why Chopsticks Make Sense
Jerry Seinfeld has an old bit about chopsticks with the underlying premise that they are somehow silly and impractical. It’s pretty funny and sums up how many Westerners feel about the utensils, but it’s also fundamentally illogical. Here’s the original shtick:
I’ll tell you what I like about Chinese people. They’re hanging in there with the chopsticks,aren’t they? You know they’ve seen the fork. They’re staying with the sticks. I don’t know how they missed it. Chinese farmer gets up, works in the field with a shovel all day. Shovel. Spoon. Come on. You’re not plowing 40 acres with a couple of pool cues!
A friend of mine referenced this last night when we went out for Chinese food in New York. But something about the idea that chopsticks are hopelessly antiquated seems totally backwards. Sure, if you’re eating a big steak, chopsticks don’t help you much. But Chinese food is entirely composed of things that have been chopped up into little pieces. Moreover, most of the time the parts you want to eat are mixed in with things you don’t (think red peppers). So wouldn’t it be better to use a more precise instrument that let’s you target exactly what you want, while avoiding the parts you don’t?
Sure, you can argue that noodles are difficult with chopsticks, but it’s not exactly like forks are ideal either. Is that whole twirling thing really working out well?
Of course, my friend said I had been living in China, perhaps brainwashed or an apologist for the foolish ways of a misguided country. He pointed out that in Thailand people don’t even use chopsticks. I disagreed with his logic that somehow a king declaring that the country should switch to the fork after eating with European leaders meant that it was a carefully considered decision based on utilitarian logic.
So I say, yes, the chopstick is a great invention, no less useful than the fork, and in many circumstances better. Perhaps I am in the minority on this, but I stand firmly in my position. Besides, if four prongs are always better than one, then why do have a tweezers?
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Chuck responds:
Posted: May 29th, 2008 at 7:53 am →
Jerry Seinfeld in the interests of his comedy bit, overlooked an important fact. Chinese people are huge fans of spoons. I have been strongly criticized in the past by Chinese for attempting to use chopsticks to eat Chinese food when a spoon was more appropriate (those delicious soups!). Anyway, I always feel obliged to point out Seinfeld’s lies.
Jeremy responds:
Posted: May 29th, 2008 at 9:29 am →
Actually the fork is a pretty odd instrument to use - even things like salad can be better handled with chopsticks (like big pieces of lettuce)
The fork is overrated. Now the spork on the other hand…
Nick responds:
Posted: May 29th, 2008 at 10:53 am →
Over the years i’ve actually migrated to actually using chopsticks as a cooking utensil. More control. I saw a guy eating fries in McDonalds in Shandong once using drinking straws as chopsticks. Maybe we should all graduate to eating with tongs
Rhys responds:
Posted: May 29th, 2008 at 1:21 pm →
love the ’sticks. they help in not scoffing your food too fast as well.
Lu responds:
Posted: May 29th, 2008 at 5:07 pm →
I strongly doubt you’re in a minority on this (what with 1.5 billion people agreeing with you).
I eat Thai food with chopsticks too, even if the Thai don’t. Noodles are easier to eat with chopsticks (provided that you hold the bowl close to your mouth and just shovel them in) than with a fork. Taiwanese eat noodles with chopsticks and spoon, which looks even more efficient, but I haven’t mastered that skill yet (don’t know if Chinese do that too, I suppose they do).
revi responds:
Posted: May 29th, 2008 at 9:12 pm →
Because Chinese food often involves very quick stir-frying to economise on cooking fuel and time, the ingredients necessarily needed to be cut evenly small in order to be cooked quickly and evenly. Consequently chopsticks are the ideal instrument to pick up all the small morsels (using a spoon would just be hogging leaving little for everybody else). Incidentally, the Chinese words for chopsticks mean quick and sticks - quick to make, quick to eat with and quick to dispose of.
Jia responds:
Posted: May 30th, 2008 at 5:41 am →
I found this blog just a few days ago, but I managed to read a lot. Just want to say your writings always put a smile on my face (even some very political pieces). Thanks a lot!
chriswaugh_bj responds:
Posted: May 30th, 2008 at 8:12 am →
Revi: 筷子 are chopsticks. Quick is 快. You can see the character for quick inside the character for chopstick because they sound the same- that’s the phonetic component. The bamboo radical on top is suggestive of the meaning. As for stick, it’s certainly not 子- that means child or son. Well, it does have other meanings, most of which are related (although not all- 老子,孔子,孟子…), but the closest to stick would be its use as a measure word for long, thin things, as in 一子儿挂面,一子儿毛线. 棍 would be one option for stick, although I’m sure people could find other words. So, nice try, but a little fact-checking would’ve been in order.
Oh, and Chinese food is quick to cook, but takes ages in the preparation- all that chopping things into small pieces is quite time-consuming.
And Josh, I agree whole-heartedly, chopsticks/kuàizi/筷子 are most excellent implements.
Robet Vance responds:
Posted: May 30th, 2008 at 9:15 am →
I love using chopsticks because it presents a special challenge especially when I am eating noodles or peanuts. I really think my hand-eye coordination has greatly improved since I first learned how to use the ’sticks’ a few years ago.
revi responds:
Posted: May 30th, 2008 at 10:44 pm →
@ chriswaugh
Touche, I was breezily refering to the radical 快 but you are correct on the full Chinese characters for chopsticks. However radicals within individual Chinese characters contribute not just a phonetic component, but also lend other sublet meanings and aspects (note the different radicals appended to the character for gold to differentiate different metals) which in this case means quick to make from bamboo 筷 while 子 can also mean small sticks in this context. The Chinese language like many other languages is not just about grammatic technicalities or “spelling”, but also about context and composition, which is also why I find that simplified Chinese writing easier but also alot less elegant, less descriptive and meaningful than the traditional Chinese script.
hopi responds:
Posted: May 31st, 2008 at 2:56 am →
I heart chopsticks! But I heart Tiao Gen (spoon) even more!
revi responds:
Posted: May 31st, 2008 at 9:09 am →
@ chriswaugh
BTW if you use 棍 for stick in the context of chopsticks, the Chinese would just laugh their heads off since 棍 is more often used to denote much larger “sticks” as in broomsticks , long shovel stick, a lond rod or even a weapon such as those Shaolin monks often use or the stick you see in pictures of the monkey king. Consequently I would love to see you use 筷 棍 to eat your food, LOL. So, “nice try, but a little fact-checking would’ve been in order” right back at you and a big fat raspberry to go with it too just to keep things lighthearted
chriswaugh_bj responds:
Posted: May 31st, 2008 at 10:41 am →
With 棍 I was thinking of sticks in general, not necessarily small ones useful for eating. First word that popped into my head. Shoulda made that clearer.
I still don’t see 子 as small sticks in this context and can’t find any reference to support your claim. Seems to me to be a pretty common suffix: 狮子,孩子, for example.
Lu responds:
Posted: May 31st, 2008 at 4:59 pm →
From what I learned, chopsticks used to be called tingzi (don’t know which characters), but ting sounds the same as ’stop’, and so the word was taboo at boats (since it would be bad for business if the boat couldn’t sail on). On boats, people started to refer to chopsticks as kuaizi, since kuai sounds like ‘fast’. Apparently this new name spread to the rest of the people as well.
In Taiwanese chopsticks are called ti7. I suspect that is related to the old name, tingzi, rather than the current one, kuaizi.
So, seems there is a relation between fast and chopsticks, but it is not that chopsticks themselves are somehow fast.
Lu responds:
Posted: May 31st, 2008 at 5:03 pm →
Btw, the radical for 筷 is 竹, not 快. You could explain the character 筷子 as ’something made of bamboo 竹 that sounds like fast 快’.
子 has a lot of meanings but ’small sticks’ isn’t one of them, to the best of my and my dictionary’s knowledge.
Tony responds:
Posted: June 3rd, 2008 at 1:15 pm →
It’s expected westerners tend to be against chopsticks; using chopsticks requires articulate finger and hand coordination, not every westerner is capable of using chopsticks.